nostalgiaultra:

Me in the party: Gosh golly! This beat is… Whoo! This beat is… DANDY!

(via indoplasm)

tylerchokely:

*skips tutorial* how the fuck do you play this game

(via andrewquo)

cooldragonboy4000:

i just ordered dominos and they gave me this

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so i was like what the fuck and complained (literally how do u even eat this? tell me.) and they gave me another pizza and i was so excited to see how like perfectly constructed this next pizza was gonna be because wouldn’t you assume they would care more in order to Satisfy the Customer. well

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i am suing dominos and i hate america 

(via cartesiantroubles)

mangosmoothie7:

my mom: you arent going to wear a bra?

me: everyone hav nipple

(via iamthewhitegirl)


giggleshrug:

Nicki Minaj ft. the VMAs 

(via joshpeck)

charl-plural:

bloodbending:

noctstiel:

bloodbending:

bloodbending:

idea: the porn olympics, where people compete to have the most nsfw stuff on their monitors as dangerously close to their parents as possible without them seeing

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GAME START

why is your dad shirtless

he’s hispanic it happens

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i win

(via guy)

daddyfuckedme:

do u ever catch ur dog watching tv and wonder what the hell they’re thinking about

(Source: daddyfuckedme, via spork)

dicpic:

Ariana reminds me of that one girl that is wholesome and cute yet is rumoured to have used a carrot as a dildo and broke in her 

(via fivegum)